Through His Eyes
by xOx-Waiting-For-My-Vampire-xOx
Summary: Set During NEW MOON- Contains Spoilers. Edwards POV on the departure of his family, trying to cope with doing the one thing he resents most...Breaking Her Heart. E-POV...ONCE AGAIN CONTIANS SPOILERS, IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED NM DON'T READ! ExB--ANGST!


**A Heart Like Mine Can't Be Broken**

**  
A/N: Hey guyz, I decided to write this after re-reading New moon...I couldn't deny telling Edwards story, If you don't like angst I suggest you click the back button, now.**

"Edward" Carlilse said...  
"You can stay with Bella..." Esme reasoned  
"Edward?" Alice asked  
"You think I'd leave you, my family for bella?" How could they think that?  
"Your love?" Alice finished  
This made Rose scoff, she must've found my re-action silly...  
"I'll tell her tomorrow.." I said before walkign out of the room...  
_"I'm so sorry"_ I herd Jasper think...It wasn't his fault, I'd rather have us out of the way...she nearly died... I just don't know how to tell her...

"BUT I DON'T WANT YOU TO COME!" I couldn't belive I said that, I didn't mean it...I never will, ofcourse I want her to come  
"Oh..." She choked...I couldn't stand it, the break in her voice, Her heartbeat slowed...How can I do this?...I can't... I have to go...  
And without a word, I went turned and ran off, I stopped a couple of miles ahead.. I climbed a tree and watched her as she paced through the forest calling my name...The tears gatherd behind my eyes, the tears that would never fall, then she fell...

I hadn't spoke, I hadn't took a breath. You see my heart cannot be broken, It can just be tortured, continuously...And that's what this is...The last words I spoke to her were the very ones that broke her heart, her breath shallowed and I couldn't take it...I'm not heartless (in so many ways) but it must've seemed that way...

How can the clocks still tick? How can time still go on...My tortured soal cried out for help, but I ignored it, There is nothing more that I would like then to hold her...hear her breath...feel her shudder in my arms...All I want is for her to know the truth, but maybe it's better this way.

I hoped that she's move on & have a normal life, I hoped that she'd forget me and maybe let another man heal the deep wounds that I opend up as I left. At least that's what I should hope...

"Edward, were going hunting, don't suppose you want to come?" Alice said... she knew that she wasn't getting an awnser  
"_This is pathetic! Get over it! I know you loved her anall but you can't live your life regretting meeting that one girl!" I hear Rose think  
"_I DON'T REGRET MEETING HER!" I snarled, but –as much as I hated it – I knew that she was right. I guess it was time to move on ;Easier said than done.

We went hunting and I guess you could say we had fun – if that's the word you would use-

Had she gotten over me? Was she having fun? And most of all...Was she safe? The thought of her in danger made my stomach knot...

Alice gasped... I tried to read her thoughts, but she was blocking me out...  
"Edward? What's the matter with alice?" Carlilse said  
"I don't know" _much to my dismay  
_"Why not?" Jasper growled..It was obvious that he was worried, he is allways on edge.  
"I'm fine" Alice croaked, It was obvious that whatever she saw was distressing.  
2" I've got to go see Tanya, they're in trouble..."  
"We'll come with you, Emette pack the bags, Esme you.." Carlilse said  
"No! I need to do it alone! There could be big trouble!" She seemed sure...  
That's when Alice ran off, Rosaline followed her quickly. I figured it was a girl thing so followed the sent of yet another mountain lion...

"Emette! You can't tell Edward" I heard, I passed her door on the way to my room. That was it, I was interested...nobody keeps secrets from me...  
"WHY CAN'T HE KNOW, IT'S CRUEL!" Emette shouted....  
"He's allready upset enough! You think telling him that Bella could be, you know will make things better! Keep your mouth shut!" _Bella? DID SHE JUST SAY BELLA!_  
"I CAN'T ESACTLY STOP MYSELF FROM THINKIGN ABOUT IT CAN I?" Emmette shouted...  
"Well try" Rose snarled,  
"DO YOU KNOW HOW DEAD WE WILL BE IF HE FINDS OUT WE'VE BEEN KEEPING THIS FROM HIM!"  
I could tell she gave him 'the look' that was the only way to sut him up, I slouched up the stairs...Lay on my sofa and began to mull over the possabilities....  
_Ha! It can' be that serious, They'd tell me if it was something like, i dunnoh, she's pregnant?_ Haha,  
_Wait...Prgenant? They wouldn't keep that from me...or would they?_

"I can't belive that she's dead" Emette thought_  
_"EMMETTE! TELL ME WHAT YOU WERE JUST THINKING!" I demanded, I;m going crazy, hearing things...I must be paranoid  
"err... nothing bruv, chill..." I wasn't paranoid, He was hiding something...Please tell me that I heard wrong....please?  
"DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME TO CHILL OUT!" I snarled...  
"WHY DID YOU MENTION BELLA!"  
"erm...."  
"IF YOU DON'T TELL ME I SWEAR I'LL"  
"Ok, Ok...."  
" BREAK YOUR...."  
"Just" he sighed  
"Sit down,"  
"I DON'T HAVE TIME! IS BELLA IN TROUBLE? IS THAT WHY ALICE LEFT?"  
"She... Alice saw her....She.."  
"TELL ME!"  
"She, she jumped off a cliff..."  
"NO!" I Shouted, so loud I'm sure they all heard me....I heard footstepps, they were comming to see me...

_I awoke...wait...I can't be asleep.. what the?_

"He's Awake!" Esme screamed  
"Edward?" Carlilse said  
"What happend?"  
"He knows why Alice left doesn't he?" Jasper asked the others in a quiet timid voice...  
"No... heheh, non of us do, do we?" Rose said nervously, her voice dropped towards the end...  
"No?" Emmette said..  
"I'm fine, I swear I thought I herd," Realisation smacked me across the face,  
"Bella!" I scrambled up and ran to the front door, there was nothing I can do. I could never be with her again, What was there to live for? Why should I even bother? Dry sobbs were all that came, but they never stopped, there was only one thing I could do. Only one way we could be together..._Forever.  
_ I could feel Carlilse's arm around me...  
"Don't try to talk me out of it.." I warned  
"I wouldn't waste my breath, you were such a determined boy, allways determined."  
"W..w...what are you talking about?" Esme's voice grew to hysterics...could they of guessed my plan so easily?  
"He's going on a journey..." Carlilse said before letting go of me and comforting Esme, I couldn't stand it, The atmosphere, I could sence how much they loved eachother and it made me sick...So I packed my bags and went.

"**I'd never given much thought to how I would die — though I'd had reason enough in the last few months — but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this.  
I stared without breathing across the long room, into the dark eyes of the hunter, and he looked pleasantly back at me.  
Surely it was a good way to die, in the place of someone else, someone I loved. Noble, even. That ought to count for something."**

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

I was on my way, nearly half way there, I could see the town square from hear, that's when it started...the screaming in my head  
"_She's Alive!" Alice 'screamed' _ I knew she was just saying it to get me back, but I had made my decision..  
"STOP! SHE'S ALIVE! SHE WAS WRONG!" The screaming continued, which shows she was close, no further than a couple of miles. She must've seen where I was going...  
"I SWEAR IF YOU MAKE US CHACE YOU ALL ACROSS ITALY WE WILL!"  
She must've told the rest of the family, they were on their way too. But I couldn't think of them, I would turn back...

I was in the center at last, It won't be long now... The clokc struck 12, It was time, I was about the emerge from the shadows when I saw them. The Volturi  
"Don't" I heard Felix hiss...This is my punishment, I shouldn't of endangerd her life...**  
**I stepped out and I heard the screams of mothers, the anger of farthers & the innocent cry of children...  
"EDWARD!" i heard....I did it, She was here with me.  
I inhaled the scent of her skin, more heavenly than I can describe, I felt her feeble arms around me, she pushed me out of the shade....Wait? Shade?  
"Carlilse was right, It was painless"  
"EDWARD YOUR NOT DEAD!" She said, she wasn't annoyed, she couldn't be annoyed...-

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The only was that I could describe the past few months is by saying that they were painfull...Unbelivably painfull for both me and her. I will _Never_ hurt her again,_ Never._

**A/N: There you go, that's hwo I think Edward would feel no flames please, if you didn't like it don't review.**


End file.
